im feeling random..today..was a bad+gud+suprised+nice+romantic+shocking+tiring day all packed in one..
ill just post some highlights n those i wished nv happened..

• an unknown apek farted in my face!
• a cute guy ride in the same train wif me!!
• im lyk debarred!
• sch end at 5 tuition end at 9!
• he picked me up in uniform!
  
• we walked all the way home together!he kinda serenaded me wif his high-pitched voice!
  
• found out quite a lot abt the US financial crisis n Singapore GIC and temasek holdings!!!
  

so yah..the above happened all in one day..quite rojak my day!

weird things have been happening..lyk mats approaching adi to help him pierce his lip at the bus stop..hahaha..cant stop thinking abt it..

i think life is short n u shud enjoy every minute of it!dun think too little of urselves like ur fat n ugly n stuff..its soo superficial..tats for massie n tats y i dun mind taking loads of ugly pics(see renny's blog!filled wif my weird hair n face!!hahahaha) so loong as immm happy!n i dun mind ppl using it renny!however...im seriously considering the thought of migrating after seeing the weird side of Singaporeans..n the way Singapore is..u guys shud read up abt the GIC and temasek holdings..lyk WTF!!

btw..i cant wait for renny's bdae party!!its soo gonna rock west coast!!hahahhahahaa...even tho my hair stil sux!

Labels: denial

posted by nADiA JuMpJuMpJuMp at 1:06 AM

Sorry if I sounded like a nasty kid on a puberty overdrive. Sometimes, some things can just makes me tick. Make me, and you will live to regret it. But most of the time, I can hold my temper very well. And that's why I'm still not available. I'm a very patient man. Very patient indeed. Haha... That's for you, Nadia! ;) Life is really full of shit, I tell ya. It's no bed of roses.

What will go through your mind if I say I'm going back to school at NYP after my NS? Wasting my time, stupid? I know. But that's the easiest way out. But don't worry. That's not on top of my list. On top of my list is taking SAT. Both SAT and SAT II (Maths & Physics). I'm just gonna take it for fun. And see if I can ever get full score for Maths. If I can get a very high score, I'm off from Singapore baby!! I don't need A levels to bring me to university. Else, it's just SIM for me. Not SIM University!! That kinda suck. More of like the one affiliated to UOL. It's a good one. From London School of Economy(LSE). That's what Diyana takes. Not gonna take her course of Banking. But more on my love. Mathematics and Economics. Do you think I should? I just love maths and that's why I want this. But I'm not too sure about the marketability of this certificate.

Oh well.. I've fucked my life too much. What else can be new? So much potential yet so little can be seen. My regret?? Not maturing fast enough when I'm in secondary school. All my thoughts are on having the fun of my life. I don't know what else to say. All I want now is to buy to her the gift I owed, get my own PSP, get my RG370 and amp, get her her b'day gift, get my licence, get my KRR and lastly save enough for university.

Heavy load on the meagre earnings I received from being sucked dry by the government. I think NS is just a conspiracy of saving cost for the SCDF. Imagine all the sect comms being paid only $1.1k, firefighter $800, medic $600. And that also provided we can pass our own individual tests as well as pass the IPPT. Which they will try hard to fail us by setting the 2.4km timing to under 9:45 for a Gold. A regular will already get his basics of $2k. Plus about $300 or $400 more for their skill allowance. That's a whole lot of savings!! And there's more NSF than regulars in every station. All firefighters are NSF. About 1/4 to 1/3 of the Sect Comms are NSF. All the medics are NSF. All storeman are NSF. Most admin clerk are NSF. Only all the Paramedics and Drivers(aka PO) are regulars.

SCDF is a world class organisation. I agree. Organised by too many Captains and Majors. But heavily run by NSFs. Imagine if one day, all of the NS boys go on strike. I bet the Detention Barrack can't fit us all. It's a worthwhile thought to pursue. And that's when SCDF will collapse on its own. How about the army and police? That can also affect the safety of our country should the strike really happen. All of us NSFs can complain about the measly wage that's given to us.

Most will say it's an honour to serve the nation. I will say it's an honour. But to what extend? When you don't get the respect from the regulars. Most will say last time, the pay is only around $100. All I can say is that last time police wear shorts. Last time is with 3% GST. Now is 7% GST. The increase is not really 4% but much more than that due to the multiplying effect. Bus ride is no longer 30c for student. Mcdonalds is no longer $3+. Last time it takes just a few lessons to get a Bike licence. Most will say it's just 2 years. In this ever fast-paced life of Singapore, 2 years of inactivity can turn you into a noob. 2 years can make or break your business. 2 years can get you some distance on the corporate ladder. Of course, it won't affect Singapore since every guy have to serve NS. But I'm thinking globally!! Our guys are way far behind the rest of the world. 2 years to be precise.

I don't really hate NS life. I just question the reasoning for NS. Someone who need to use mask system just to sleep every night still got posted to Army. PES E? Should have been PES F. Some people already have suffered hard enough due to their disabilities. Should they be exposed more by recalling them for NS, they will suffer more. Due to the high demand of proficiency in doing work, the ridicule they will suffer from narrow minded personnel. You can call that integrating into society. But they have suffered enough.

NS is seen as serving the nation. To turn boys into men. I bet the only to turn boys into men is the DB factor. Only when they enter DB, then they will think properly and act and think more of like a man. Cos I still think I haven't changed much. Still the same old kid. But without DB, NSFs will really go on strike. That's why everyone have visit the DB facility. To discourage people from committing small crimes which merit a place inside. They can't have too many people inside DB eh. Later must increase cost to expand the place. Heh... Ciao..

posted by Adi at 10:30 AM

Him:Hello... Is that you Adi?
Me: grunting(just woke up from sleep)
Him: Do you know that you are supposed to work this morning?
Me: Yeah.. But changed already. Now I'm in rota 4. So tonight then i work.
Him:Who tell you to change rota?
Me:I don't know. Somebody call me yesterday. Told me that I'm in rota 4.
Him: Who?
Me:I don't know!! I think a Chinese paramedic or somebody told me.
Him: Who???
Me:I don't even know!!
Him: If you don't know who, you better come work now! Because you are supposed to be working today, morning shift.
Me: Fine then. I come work now.
Him: You know what time is it already now?
Me:(paused and then) I don't know. All I know is that I'm supposed to switch with the Chinese new medic. He is supposed to be working now.
Him: Really? I'll check. (pause)
Me: He's working now right?
Him: Ok...


What shit else he say, i can't remember because I just put down the phone, knowing that the extraneous complication is resolved.

One, why would a medic call me using the office phone to inform me that I've changed to Rota 4 for no apparent reason? That's why I don't bother to find out my source, who was it that informed me. And again, that previous day I was awoken by the very informative call.

Two, don't they have an occurrence book??? If there is any changes, shouldn't it be in that book? Why the hell then do they come up with an occurrence book? For show? It's there for a reason, shortie.

Anyway, does the previous conversation sounds like I'm a racist? Maybe I lack the vocabulary to properly describe the persons involved. Because I don't even know who the new medics are that have been drafted in last Friday. All I know is that there is a new Chinese medic in Rota 4, not of his name or anything. And there's 3 new medics, 2 are Malays and 1 is Chinese. So, I thought the word Chinese might help pinpoint him to the correct new medic.

As for the phrase "chinese paramedic", I can't even recall his voice, I don't even know who he was. If I say male paramedic, do you think it will help? Or will I be labeled instead as a sexist? I think not. Sue me for being wrong because he was not a paramedic. It was a medic by the name of Kenny. I didn't talk much with him and he talked quite professionally. So, blame me for not recognising his voice and thinking he's a paramedic.

Yesterday, he sounded me out over the phone. And this morning, he gave me a full blast of what he believes I need. First, about yesterday, over the phone incident, he told me the importance of verifying who said what. And only paramedics have the right to inform others of these type of changes. I covered Kenny's ass by telling him that it's on Affandi's order that he called me instead. And Said called again to double confirm it. So, fine. I scored a point and he still wants to argue on. Sorry for deflating your ego but I can't have you accusing around.

The next point he wanna argue is by telling me that he is already biased against me when I came to station due to my face-offs with him during my hospital medic times, I presume. I just said "I know" which even ticked him off to rattle on. I argued my points and reasoning diplomatically and he tried to follow suit from which I can see he's struggling to control his words. Fast and sharp. That's how he is. Me? I'm just calm with all those sarcastic smiles. Irritating? I know. I laid out all my reasons for him to believe. It's up to him whether to believe me or not. All other paramedics think I'm good enough a hospital medic, why him the anomaly? Unless the rest have been giving plastic smiles and fake words-of-praise all these times. Which is a far reaching thought. But it's still possible, having seen how plastic some paramedics can be.

With me having rest my case and showing my flaws, he don't know what else to fight on that basis. So, he moved on to the next one. My MCs. He told me that I've raked up 6 days worth of MC. Which I totally denied. Cos I knew I only took a one time 5-day MC. And he said he'll check again. And I told him he should! Cos if it's really 6 days, it need to be reevaluated again. And he told me not to play soccer if I can't really take care of myself. Truth to be told, it was actually skateboarding that injured me. Knowing it's a bad name to those shallow people like him, I lied and said it was soccer. I told him that I could take care of myself.

Injuries are part and parcel of sports. It's a question of timing. For me, it was a bad timing as it was only my first month in station. And seriously, I've never been this badly injured due to skateboarding. Even that fall from 11 steps at Bt Batok skatepark hurt me only a while. And that was like at least 3m high. This fall was just about 2m high from a railing. Just a question of my landing. Which really twisted my arm. Forgive me for injuring myself that day and for informing late about it. I didn't know the standard procedure. I've given my word that I will take better care of myself. Which is true even till now.

So why the hell need you to repeat it again? And still need to remind me about my old MCs during my hospital medic time. Ok fine, maybe I 'keng' once or twice. But I got food poisoning and dehydration for 2 of that days and another 2 for eye infection. Another 2 for having flu, fever, cough and sore throats all rolled into one. Sue me for being weak. That's one of the reasons I quitted on ERS. I knew my body will not be able to stand up to it. My internals are a bit haywired. And it's far more important than my physical attributes. Physically, you can throw me against the wall and I can still stand up and fight. That's the benefit of skateboarding. It makes you immune to pain.

When he ask all the questions with "You know or not?", I guessed he wasn't looking for "I know" as an answer. More of a rhetorical question. And when I answered with "I know" to most of his questions, I guessed I pissed him too much unintentionally. Which is weird. Cos I think he want to piss me off in the first place. Why else would a person in the right frame of mine proudly declare that he's bias against me? Scare me? Trying to piss me off more likely. Sadly, it doesn't have any resounding effect on me. And him being on the receiving end instead. What a laugh..

And why is racism the title instead? Cos it's an important event that really piss me of about human nature. Last night, while on night shift, it was just me and Affandi. I'm on standby for 433 till 9pm. He opened the topic on a friendly term. He asked me why I said the taboo word. The 'Chinese' word. I told him my reasons. He just nodded. Don't know if he accept it. He told me instead that HIM misinterpret my words as me being racist. How Affandi knows? Cos Hazlina was told by the man himself. And last night, she was in the office before going home with Affandi before I entered. I guess the topic was to tell Affandi what's going on. And then Affandi told me. Interesting! Words can get back to me in a day. I wonder who else receive that news. Knowing people, I'm sure they will sensationalize on the racist and Chinese part to even bother telling the whole story.

And me wanting to mend things, I broached the topic with HIM after he told me off this morning. I was feeling cocky, you see. He just tried to ignore the subject. Talked bad about someone and dare not speak in his face. Hmph! Asked me who said it. And I proudly said that he was Affandi. Don't know if it will affect their working relationship. Learnt my mistake to know my source already. And so I asked again why. And he said it's okay now. Cos he already asked to Affandi on why Affandi changed the medics. It was down to the Chinese and Malay ratios. So, that isn't racist then?

I understand the logic because every Chinese will be fighting for leave in Chinese New Year. So, it's better to have the numbers even out. 1 Chinese or 2 in each rota. As for Rota 1, Melvin is going to ORD in May. That's why I'm out of Rota 1 to put 1 more Chinese in. So how will it affect us then? Next year Chinese New Year? Not funny at all. I'll be clearing my leave before ORD-ing next Feb. Unless for the next few batches, there isn't any Chinese. What are the chances eh?

And so, he ended the conversation as being okay. So, what happen to the rest that have listened to his words? Will they know what's going on? Or will they think of me as a racist? To some, I'm still quite new. So, words from a paramedic hold a higher regard.

Balls to those who think I'm a racist! Maybe my words every now and then might make me sound like one. But, I'm never one. Depends on what you interpret its meaning as. The closest of me being racist is towards Malays. Which is interesting news because I find Suria a bore. I find Malay movies a cliche. Indonesian movies are romantic and scary. But other genres truly suck big time. No malay dramas for me. I prefer English movies the best. Next up will be Mandarin, Japanese, Korean, French, Thai and maybe Hindi in that order.

I love chinese chicks. My primary school crush is a Malay girl as well as a Chinese girl, Zhu Ming. In secondary school, I have plenty of crushes, 2 Chinese having made my list. One was very cute. Im a sucker for cuties. During my JC days, I liked one Chinese girl from outside school and seriously gave up on that back then. Why would I be be racist towards the Chinese? Behind those half-closed eyes and flat chests, lies wonderful personalities that totally pushed those average Malay girls to the back of my list. Who will deny their cute faces and nice legs? Indians may lack the colour but they totally make up for it for their curves. What strengths do Malay girls have? Oh yeah... The skills of applying make up and showing butt cracks to everyone.

My good friends now may indeed be Malays but my best friends in Primary School are Malay and Chinese. The closest one to me is Yap Bao Lei. I wonder what happen to him now. In secondary school, my clique is made up of Malays due to the fact that 2 thirds of the class are Malays. But that doesn't mean I don't mix around with the Chinese except for one. Cos he totally disgust me with his nasty habits and snob personality. Who will want to be near a guy who digs his nose, never iron his clothes, scratch his armpits always and ,I suspect, never bathe every morning due to the strong smell?

Having said these, you can totally deduce that I'm no racist unlike what he may still think of me now as. If from here you think I am, maybe our mindsets are of different wavelengths. And one more thing, I support Sharp boot boys. They are anti-racist.

posted by Adi at 9:06 AM

posted by nADiA JuMpJuMpJuMp at 11:07 PM

its 2008 ppl!so bloody wake up pls!!hahaha..2007 is quite a roller coaster ride for me and i hope 2008 will be as exciting n fun!!woohoo!

How i spent the new year..
i was working on new year's eve n damn its tiring!the crowd was overwhelming i tell u!but topman marina did very well as we hit our sales target!!woohoo!!congrats babies!!even though im working, i got to see the fireworks n it was sooooo nice..like me!hahahahaha..ok i take it back b4 anyone puke..for the first time i saw the pink one!n pink is officially my favourite colour!hahahaha..finished work at 1230 sharp as everyone was excited to go home..it was supersupersuper crowded!!the people was either scary or excited..lots of mats n irritating girls n disgusting hyper banglas..cant stand it..then i met adi darling coz he's der to see the fireworks with Lam(my cuzzy) n Zul(his irritating friend)..we didnt have any plans so decided to walk all the way from MSQ to the cathay coz we can neither take the bus or the train..


we then decided to watch a movie while waiting for the crowd to disperse..we watched BODY #19 n damn its scary..the fact that we watched it at 335 in the morning made it scarier..reached home at ard 9 in the morn n was supposed to be at work at 1030!!meaning i cant take even a nap!gosh!2008 is tiring oreadi!!i need a break!a vacation maybeee???*hint hint*

i wanted to thank specific ppl for making my life damn shiook in 2007 but the list is endless!!so, i guess, i just compile everything n make it a scrapbook aite?hahhaaaa..

and one more thing...IM GONNA HIT THE BIG 2-0 IN 28 DAYSSSSS!!!DAMMMITTTT!!n i still want presentsss!!!

posted by nADiA JuMpJuMpJuMp at 6:52 PM